The Famous Improv Game “I am a tree” As Played By Two Actual Trees

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Two trees.

 

Curtain rises. We see two trees standing centerstage. 

Tree #1:   I am a tree.

Tree #2:   Jerry.

Tree #1:   I am a tree.

Tree #2:   Jerry, can we not do this—

Tree #1:   I am a tree.

Tree #2:   Jerry, this is not the time. I had a day. You know I’m normally up—

Tree #1:   I am a tree.

Tree #2:   —normally up for playing. But tonight all I can think about is that Michelob Ultra in the fridge.

Tree #1:    …

Tree #2:   Jerry.

Tree #1:   …

Tree #2:   The Michelob Ultra is still there, isn’t it? Did you drink it? JERRY?

Tree #2 lashes out with a brach, severing Tree #1’s carotid artery. Tree #1 bleeds (sap) until it collapses, dead.

Curtain falls suddenly.

 

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